It hasn't been the greatest week lots of emotional downs. I believe that the lows felt worse than they have done before because it felt like such a fall after having such a good week the week before.
This is partly down to the break up of my marriage and partly down to living with Bi-Polar
of which I was diagnosed as having two years ago.
When living with Bi-Polar your behaviour can be so irrational that building good relationships with colleagues, friends, and families can be hard. However rebuilding them is so much harder, you can do so much damage to these relationships during your highs and lows. Real friends are always there for you but unfortunately it is just to much for others, they just find it to hard to live through it with you. It's not surprising really considering some of the behaviour that can accompany this disease.
You can feel very lonely and very out of control at times. I tend to hurt and push the people I love the most away rather than ask them for help. This weekend was one of those times. So much damage can be done in a very short time.
However, I have been to see the Mental Health team at the local hospital today and I'm going to have a review of my meds and hopefully get into talking therapies as soon as possible.
Right that's enough of that
Here's a selection of photo's from one of my favourite places. I love to walk around these gardens whatever the weather.
Today I'm grateful for,The chance to wake up and enjoy another day,
For the love of my children,
For good friends
For new friends